Sunday, May 11, 2008

A confession

Today is Mother's Day. Being as it is, I feel the need to share this.

I had a miscarriage. On June 25th, 2007 I lost a baby that I had so many hopes and dreams for. A baby that was so much wanted and already so loved. That first week I thought I wanted to die. The pain, both physical and mental, was horrific.

I didn't have many people to talk to. We had only told a very small handful of people. While they were a great comfort to me, I needed a place to REALLY talk about my feelings and have others who knew where I was coming from. That's when I found TheNest's Pregnancy Loss board.

It was still small at that time and the women were a truly wonderful and supportive group. When I posted about my loss and the feelings I was having, I got so many responses and condolences that I sobbed as my heart healed a little. One of the best responses I received helps me even now. It gave me the title for this blog. It helps me through any day that I just don't think I can get past. Unfortunately, I did not save the name of the girl who left this for me. So, whoever you are, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I'm now going to share it with all of you out there in blogland, in hopes that it may help heal any hurts you have.

"I understand about breaking points, and you are certainly being pushed to the brink. As corny as it is, picture in your head, right now, a shiny, beautiful, straight, tall, unwavering golden rod, which can not be broken. That is you, Kate. That is you.

There are others here to pick you up. Right now, just visualize, and make it through each moment. Knowing that we are right there with you in that moment, holding your hand and your heart."

3 comments:

v said...

Okay, now I'm crying. I'm glad you found that space to share and get the support you needed because I felt so far away and so useless.

I look forward to further posts, heavy or light.

v said...

Oh, I almost forgot...please explain to me how you got such a great background.

v said...

Oh, and I was thinking of you in the middle of the night when I was watching this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M6ZjMWLqJvM

[And, yes, I am personally trying to overload your comments...go me.]