I'm back

And I kept all of my clothes on. Just had my blood pressure taken. And my blood pressure was high. What?! My blood pressure is never high. Just goes to show you how friggin stressed I've been for the past few days. When the doctor came in, he talked to me about the results and the next steps to take.

He does think I have PCOS. He says it's a tough diagnosis to really pinpoint because there are so many symptoms that you could have that could mean that you have it (or don't). He's going to treat me for it though because all signs point to it and the treatment for it is what should help me anyways.

He prescribed Metformin to help handle the high insulin levels. I'm ready and kinda excited about this one.This should hopefully help with other issues I've been having as well (weight gain and acne specifically). ::fingers crossed:: My friend Sarah called it "the pretty pill." ;) We shall see.

He also wants to put me on Clomid. This scares the crap out of me. Good thing though that there's things that have to be done before the Clomid is started. I have to get an HSG done to check and make sure everything is clear in my tubes and ovaries. And Mike has to have his sperm analyzed to make sure all the little swimmers are good to go. I pretty sure they're fine since we did manage to get pregnant once before, but it's good to know for sure. And I shouldn't have to be the only one to get things analyzed.

My plan is to try the Metformin (and still Provera) for three months and see what happens. If nothing's different after that, then we'll move ahead with the monitored Clomid cycle.

Taking many deep breaths and jumping in to the world of infertility.

I'm scared

I know it's irrational, but I'm really nervous about this appointment today. I think it's fear of the unknown. I have no idea what's going to happen today. I have no idea if we're just going to talk, or he's going to do some sort of exam. Are they going to take blood? Prescribe medications?

I know he's going to ask if I have any questions. I know that as always I'm going to go totally blank. There's going to be tons of info or whatever and I'm just going to try to look like I'm functioning. My stomach is already in knots and this blog is taking twice as long to write because my hands are kinda shaking and my brain is not remembering where all of the keys are. ::deep breath:: I know I'm getting myself all worked up and making this much more than it is. But I am truly scared. I'll update when I get back.

And the answer is....

My insulin levels actually were high. I'm shocked. Truly.

I have an appointment to talk to the doctor about the next course of action. On Thursday. As in, THIS Thursday. Like, two days from now. It's amazing to me that the first appointment I could get when I said I couldn't get pregnant was a month and a half wait, then another three months of "try this and see what happens". Now, suddenly they can get me in immediately. Mind you, I'm not complaining about me getting in so quickly this time. But why couldn't we get to this point 5 months ago?

I love my husband

And here's one of the reasons:

The man can fix my computer. Yes folks, one of the many reasons that I "keep him around" is because he helps me out in moments of computer failitude. I should have put in in our vows. "Love and cherish. Throught the sickness and health of both her and her computer."

Last night, while downloading the newest episode of Bleach we somehow ended up with a horrible thingy attaching itself to my computer ("malware" is what Mike says the thingy was. All I know is that it freaked me the heck out!) Suddenly, my laptop's background was changed to the blue screen of death saying that I didn't have virus protection and needed to update. When we went to change it back, my display panel was missing its desktop and screensaver tabs. Yes, that's right. They were GONE! Gone people. I was lost. Seeing my eyes wide with fear and tears starting to well up, Mike jumped to the rescue.

Away to one of his computer geek sites he went and found out what the "malware" was called (spy sherrif) and how to get rid of it. Two hours of downloading new software and searching through files, and my computer was (and still is) fixed. YAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYY!!!!

And to honor his wonderful abilities, this...

...is my new desktop background. Just add a cape and he could fly.

Also, cd1. Meh.

WHAT?!

Walked out to my car this morning, ready for work. Sit down, set up my iPod, turn on the car. Ummm. Let's try that again. Turn on the car. Turn. On. The. Car. Nope. Not happening. Apparently, my car was angry that it was left alone for a few days and decided to kill the battery. How? I do not know.

So, lesson learned. My car has an attitude and I need to be more sensitive to it's needs apparently.

quick note

Sorry it's been a few days. I'm up here in Washington State visiting friends and getting my baby fix. I'll update with a full story when we get home.

Other updates: Reynee is being adopted (or may possibly already be with her new forever family), I got my stupid insulin done but haven't heard back the results, and it's cd27 and I'm at low (finally) on the CBEFM. Yet another month down the drain.

Oh, and I found out that "U-Dub" has a library masters. Now I've just got to look into it and see if it's a good fit for me (and if it's even a possibility for me to get in).

Results?

I FINALLY heard back from the doctor's office about the bloodwork I had done on the 3rd (yes, the 3rd! It's now the 16th).

Good side: All levels that were tested were normal. I asked what this entailed and was told testosterone, lh, choleterol, glucose, estrogen, etc...

Bad side: for some godforsaken reason, they didn't test my insulin which was apparently what the doctor really wanted to know about. It's why it had to be fasting levels. Arg!!!! So, I'm going back tomorrow to get the stupid insulin test.

Apparently, doctor thinks I might have PCOS (poly cystic ovarian syndrome). After looking it up, I say there's no way. Yes, I have a lot of the outward symptoms (overweight, anovulatory cycles, acne), but I have hardly any of the actual effects (high testosterone, extra body hair, hair loss, high glucose, high blood pressure, elevated cholestorol). So, I'll be very interested to see what he says when these results come back.

Do any of you out there have PCOS and can share your experiences? How did the doctor determine you had it? What treatments did they prescribe?

Right now, I'm so lost and confused. And I'm not looking forward to another insanely long wait to hear results. And, it seems like this is what the doctor is leaning toward and I wonder what he'll do if the results don't tell him what he wants to "hear." What else could be wrong?

Oh, and in CBEFMland, we're on cd22 - still frickin' highs with no end in sight. AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!