Just a little progress please?!

I was so hoping to go into the doctor today and have him tell me I'm dilating or something. But no. I'm still at 1cm (been there for a month) and still high. BooHiss. 
Oh well, keep cooking in there little baby. But know that I'm ready for you any time now, ok?  And please don't make me go to my induction date which is... ready for it...June 10th at 3:30 AM.  Yes A.M., people.  As in, so fricking early I may as well not sleep at all.  So please little girl, start making some progress soon.

Anyone need some "Baby Dust?"

I'm offering to pass it around because apparently, my school has been hoarding it all.  Remember how at the beginning of the year, there were 5 pregnant women and 1 teacher's wife pregnant as well?  Yes, 6 babies due for the year.  Well, then I got my BFP.  That brings our total for the year to 7.  There were really only two others that were possibilities to get pregnant this year.  Oh yes, you guessed it - both pregnant.  Due within 10 days of each other.  

So seriously, it's time to pass this off.  If you want some, let me know.  I'll blow it off in your direction.

One cranky cervix later

And the baby seems to be doing just fine! Strong heartbeat of 140 bpm. My blood pressure was high. I think that's just because I was freaking out though. Then they did a loverly pap exam. UGH! Not my favorite thing in the world anyways, but pregnant, it seemed to suck more than usual. And apparently I have a very sensitive cervix. It does not like being messed with. The doctor immediately said "Oh, you're going to have some spotting. I just barely swabbed and I can already see the bleeding." Wonderful. But everything's ok. And that's the best news I cold ever hope for.

The big ultrasound is scheduled for January 5th. I'm going to have to change it though because I realized on the way home that that is the first day back from Winter Break and I can't take it off. So hopefully I can get in just a few days later. We'll see.

So now you're as up to date as I am. Hooray!

A long overdue update.

First and foremost, I am officially in my second trimester. Hooray!!! Now I just have to hope that everything is progressing normally in there. My next doctor's appointment is on Dec 4th so I'll have to wait it out. ::sigh::

In other not so great news, our foster pug Howie was attacked last night. The people in the house behind us have two bigs dogs and one jumped over the fence and got Howie. Luckily, Mike ran outside as soon as he heard the disturbance and got the dogs inside (Chiisai didn't get touched). He called me, I called the pug rescue, and I got him to the vet ASAP. They kept him overnight and are still keeping him tonight. He's not eating, he's running a fever, and he has fluids filling up his neck where he got bit. The vet has him on IV antibiotics and won't let him come home until the fever breaks and he's eating (completely understandable).

I know there's nothing that we could have done to prevent it, but I still feel horrible. I'm really hoping that he pulls through this. I don't know how I could handle losing another pug after what happened with Yoda. Please keep little Howie in your thoughts.

Respect the TURKEY!

Christmas lights should be banned until at least the day after Thanksgiving.

Anyone with me? Anyone? ::crickets::

Now, I don't think of myself as a humbug or anything, but our neighbors down the street already have their lights up and turned ON. Come on people! I understand wanting to get them up early so that you can turn them on ASAP after the turkey has been eaten but geez! Fine. Put them up. You can't turn them on for another two weeks though. Ok?

Oh, and I'm 12 weeks today! Hooray second trimester!!!

Check me out!

I'm past 11 weeks! Officially the most pregnant I've ever been! WooHoo!

Still not looking pregnant. I can feel that I'm getting bigger. My underwear are tighter and by the end if the day, I definitely have to unbutton my pants. I plan on starting to take belly pics next week. If I'll share them on here, I don't know yet. Believe me people (although most of you know me IRL), I am not a tiny person. I'm not humongous but I am definitely heavy. I don't think I'll really be showing any time soon.

Speaking of, well, pregnancy I guess, a few people at work know. Literally, 3. One woman knew the day I found out. She was one person that I confided in about out IF and so she checked up on me periodically. She'd ask, "So, how are ... things?" with a lifted eyebrow. I'd answer back, "nothing special." Well, in our last 2ww, she happened to ask and I answered back, "we'll know in two weeks." She had a huge smile and said, "Well then, I'll ask again in two weeks." The day that I found out, we had a luncheon at work. She was standing next to me in line and looked at me questioningly. I smiled a huge smile and gave her two thumbs up. If she could have, I think she would have screamed and gone running around the building. But she didn't. She smiled and squeezed my hand. Then she said how happy she was and that I needed to bring a video to the ultrasound because they would tape it for you. :)

My VP knows because, strangely, I ran into her when I was leaving the doctor's office after my appointment Tuesday. She was leaving at the same time I was and we rode the elevator down together. Weird. Completely weird. I was holding a package of prenatal vitamins and a "Congratulations on your new pregnancy" booklet. I figured I should spill. She seemed happy enough and said congrats.

Then, somehow, my librarian found out. I really don't mind that she knows. I love her and she kinda knew about our IF. I think lady #1 tipped her off (they're really good friends). She grabbed me on the way to morning lineup and said, "So, you had a doctor's appointment yesterday....?" "Yes," I answered. "And....?" "It was with a doctor." "It was with a baby doctor though, right?" This caught me off guard. "Umm, yeah." "And......." "I'm definitely pregnant." She made a slight squealing noise and told me how excited she was for me. She said she kept looking around at all the pregnant women at school and thinking that it must be killing me. She was so glad that it was finally my turn. Me too!

Anyways, that's my update. I know it's long and rambly but I wanted to get it out there. I hope you're all doing well.

A day of interest :)

Lots of things today. Voting, doctor, and morning sickness.

Ah yes, I had my first bout of morning sickness. Luckily, just a few minutes of gagging and dry heaves with spit and it was over. Here's to hoping that's the extent of my experience with this lovely symptom. :) (although if it means delivering a healthy baby, I'll take it every day)

The doctor's appointment was not what I was expecting. I was prepared to have an exam or at least have him use the doppler to hear the heartbeat. Nope. Nothing. Told me the due date (note the ticker change) and set up another appointment. Asked if I had any questions. That was it. Luckily, he did answer all of my questions. Surprising news (that made my day): I can have sushi! Now mind you, the only "raw" sushi I eat is seared ahi, but I love it soooooo much. I think maybe I'll try to talk Mike into going this weekend. Yum! I can also have hot dogs and lunch meat. And I only need to keep taking the Metformin for 2 more weeks. Hooray again!

Then, they took my blood. Lots and lots of it. 7 vials of it. Well, 6 and then the tech looked at the order again and realized that he'd missed one. So he stuck me AGAIN! I hate needles and have mild panic attacks when they're needed. I wanted to throttle that tech. But it's over and no more for another 4 weeks as long as all stays good. :)

Me and "the blob" voted today. Yes, my voice was heard. I did everything in my power to make the nation the way I want it. I have a sticker to prove it! We'll see what happens. ::watches CNN:: How many of you are with me?

It's all good!

We have a "blob" as Mike is now referring to the baby. Heartbeat 170 bpm. It was just beating away. Measuring 9w1d. So we've got a quick little grower in there! Official edd is May 29, 2009. Yaaaaaaaay!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ah, a sigh of relief

Ok, the nurse ACTUALLY called back today and didn't keep me waiting! Thank you very much! :)

My numbers are looking really good. HCG is up to 1560 and progesterone is staying about the same place at 16.7. It made me feel sooo much better today and I was able to stay calm and collected today even though I was falling over from the feeling that I haven't slept in days. Nevermind the fact that I have been falling asleep between eight and nine every night. HA.

So, I have an ultrasound set up for October 28th (I'll be 8w4d) and my first appointment with the doctor on November 4th (I'll be 9w4d). So yaaay, things to look forward to!

Now that everything's been someone settled at least for a few weeks, the pregnancy talk should slow down some. I'll start posting my random junk again soon. :)

Choices

I feel that I am making a choice every day to allow myself to embrace or keep my distance (figuratively of course) from this pregnancy. Some days are better than others. Last time it took about 9 weeks to really wrap my head around the whole thing. We lost the baby at 10 weeks. So my brain says that as soon as I really start accepting that I *should* have a baby next summer, the dream will be shattered soon after.

In an attempt to stop this vicious cycle, I am going to try to live by these affirmation statements. I pulled them from one of my boards a long time ago and have had them saved on my computer since then.

1. "Today I am pregnant and I love my baby."

2. "I am pregnant until someone tells me otherwise."

3. "My past does not dictate my future. A previous miscarriage does not mean I will have another miscarriage."

4. "There is nothing I can do to prevent a miscarriage from happening. Worrying yourself sick doesn't prevent a miscarriage. And if (God forbid) it were to happen again, I know I will survive."

That last one is the hardest. It really easy to say that worrying doesn't help anything, but I'm a natural worrier, and it's really hard to try to be calm during all of this.

But, I did get my second set of beta results yesterday. HCG went from 81 to 400. Progesterone went from 16.4 to 16.2. That HCG number makes me happy. That progesterone number is kinda scary. The doctor isn't concerned about it though so I guess I'll try not to be worried either. I went in for yet another blood draw yesterday. The nurse said she would keep an eye out for my results and get back to me on Monday. I'm not holding my breath. I'll be lucky to hear from them by Tuesday. Either way, let's hope those numbers continue to climb.

So, in an attempt to follow the second mantra up there, I went searching for a pregnancy ticker. There are some really cute ones out there! So, now I need help choosing one. Here are the top four contenders:

Choice #1.


Choice #2.


Choice #3.


Choice #4.


Which is your favorite?

It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood

Sing along now everyone. :)

My day started out with this:


It came up really quick, too. So that made me feel better.


The drive to work produced this BEAUTIFUL sunrise. (Don't worry, I wasn't driving)

At school my kids were great. We even got to start our Air and Weather science unit. Here's a pic I took of the kids experimenting.

Notice the blue circled feather. The kids were having a blast trying to keep them up in the air. Also, I have highlighted the kid in the corner. He was AMAZED that he could blow a cotton ball across his desk with a straw. :D

The sun was setting as we drove home. Again, it was beautiful. I took this one out the car window.

And I made Mike pull the car over so we could get this one at the end of our street.

Aaaaaand, I heard back from the nurse. On Friday (3w6d pg), my HCG was 81 and my progesterone was 16.4. I *think* those are decent numbers for early pregnancy. She had me come in for another blood test today to check that the numbers are doubling correctly. (Yes, I know it's supposed t be a 48 hour test, but again, my office is stupid.) I can just tell you that I will be happy if the numbers are around 300 from this one. And I hope my progesterone goes up.

So, all in all, it was a very good day. And now I'm off to have sweet potato fries and a BLT with avocado. Yuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmm!